Today I am in one of those ‘will it ever happen’ moods……yech. I thought this photo may be appropriate, we took it when we were home for Christmas last year. We were driving back and the roads were crap, but the trees were so beautiful covered in snow. I am feeling a bit crap and anxious like we were on that road, but trying to see the beautiful snow covered trees so I can find a positive in the negative.
I think it has a lot to do with a recent change in my cycle. After the last IVF in September, my normally clockwork 28 days have turned into clockwork 35 day cycles. I usually have pms for the week before my period, but with this longer cycle, my pms is also longer. I started googling early menopause and cancer and all kinds of nastiness……not a smart thing to do.
I am particularly concerned about this cycle, because from Day 14 I have had really bad pms. Really sore and huge boobies, feeling off, sore uterus…..I know what you are thinking and I did an hpt on Day 25 and of course it was a negative. Now you are probably thinking, ‘but that is too early!’. I have another hpt and will do it again around Day 30….but it will be negative. My cycle has been out of sorts since september remember and this has become the new normal for me.
I am heading to my FS in mid February and we will see what all this pms and long cycles is all about. I really want to start IVF#6 end of February or beginning of March, but would like to make sure I don’t have any underlying issues before we do that.
It is a confusing time. The longer cycle make my head spin and the extended pms makes me uncomfortable and in a foul mood. Hmmm…..I sound like the girl in the Exorcist. That is what I feel like.